I write about this a lot but I'm amazed at how quickly life is going by. I was working this afternoon on some stuff for Fall. I cannot believe that in a few weeks summer session at preschool will be over! I feel like we just said "Happy New Year" and were talking about how great 2010 was going to be.
I want time to slow down. I know it won't but it would be a nice idea. I feel like I'm going to blink and five years will have passed by. I guess this doesn't really fall under the "being content column". I'm trying so hard to find contentment in the moment and not in the way I want things to be.
I know my blog surprises a lot of people who are in my life. Let me explain. I don't let anyone see me grieve (well, there have been a few people who have experience my "moments"). I don't do being upset or emotional in public. In fact, I try to avoid situations where I know I will probably not be able to keep "the grief", as I refer to it, in check. I don't enjoy making people feel uncomfortable. I know this probably isn't the healthiest thing for me to do but I don't really know how to change this part of me. Most days I do really well. This week has been such a challenge for me. There have been moments where I have felt so full of sadness that at any moment I felt like I could just overflow....I identify with other people's grief in a completely different way now. It's much more of a personal thing for me. I've had a very heavy heart for several families in our community this week. I've had moments where I've just had to consciously make myself think about something else. This may sound harsh or insensitive but I take things on in such a way know that at times it's still too raw and painful to visit for too long. I say this verse over and over, especially during weeks like this......
"My grace is enough for you. When you are weak, My power is made perfect in you."
2 Corinthians 12: 9 (NCV)
I'm sorry for those of you who have emailed me and haven't received a response. I appreciate every single email, comment & message that you send. I can't even begin to tell you the encouragement that I have felt from your words. I hate that life has gotten so busy that I am unable to respond to every email. I promise soon to do a Q & A blog post soon to respond to some of the more popular questions. It still amazes me that people actually read about our life.
2 days ago